“What are you doing?”
“I’m getting your stuff. You’re staying with me.” He says it without pausing, without even looking at me.
I make a surprised choking/laughing sound in the back of my throat and say, “No, I am most certainly not staying with you.” I’m fully grown and have been taking care of myself since I can remember. I don’t need Declan or his handouts.
Well, except for the job. I need the job.
He sets a laundry basket on the pavement and glances at me. “It’s either that or you make room for me in your car. Your choice.”
My mouth opens, but nothing comes out at first. I think I’m struck stupid. “Why are you doing this?”
He glares at me. “Why am I refusing to leave an attractive girl alone in her car overnight? Gee, I don’t know. I must be some kind of asshole.”
Anger flares in me, and I’m thankful for the familiar emotion. Declan’s got me all mixed up, and I don’t like it. “Point made, asshole, but I’m not some stray cat you can just take in.”
A smile flirts with his lips as he nods to my pile of stuff. “Get your things, Kitten.”
***
“You’re really gonna make me stay with you?” I ask, disbelieving. “Even though I don’t want to.”
“Yep.”
I follow him across the street as he absconds with my things. “Some would consider that kidnapping, you know.”
***
“My keys are in my pocket. Mind digging ’em out for me?” He shifts the laundry baskets to expose the one closest to me.
“You want me to stick my hand in your pants and dig around near your crotch? Seriously?”
He barks out a laugh and tilts his hip toward me. “C’mon, it’s not gonna bite. I promise.”
My brow arches as I switch his bag to the other hand. “All right, but don’t come crying to me when your pissed-off hostage punches you in the balls.”
Tentatively, I slip my hand inside his pocket, hating the way my heart beats faster just from touching him. I try to tell myself it’s only because I’ve gone two months without sex and being this close to a guy is stirring up old, familiar feelings of lust, but I know that’s not true. It’s Declan who’s making me feel all light-headed and electric.
A soft laugh threads through the air between us, making the tiny awning seem even smaller. How can a laugh sound sexy? It shouldn’t even be possible. “Kitten,” he says, his deep voice snaking around that damn word like a caress, making it easier to bear. Shit, I think he could read the phone book to me and I’d be riveted. “I saw the way you were looking at me earlier,” he continues. “I seriously doubt you’d be anything but nice to my balls.”
***
Declan’s eyes land on me as I pull out my chair. “I didn’t know if you liked mayo, but—” he shrugs “—I figured you could use the calories.”
I roll my eyes, trying not to let on how much that stings. “Sorry my body’s not to your liking.” I’m not blind—I know I’ve lost a good fifteen pounds in the last two months, what with not being able to afford luxuries like food and all. But coming from Declan? Gorgeous, he’s-so-perfect-I-don’t-know-how-he’s-not-photoshopped Declan?
Well, his insinuation that I’m somehow not good enough hurts. The last thing you want someone you find attractive to point out is that you’re, well, not.
Declan takes another bite of his sandwich, his gaze level with mine as he chews, then swallows. “I never said I didn’t like it, I said there needs to be more of it.”
***
“Well . . . look at you,” I say, gesturing to the sleeves of ink sticking out from the sleeves of his plain white tee. “You don’t really look like the relationship type.”
“What type do I look like?”
The reckless type who specializes in amazing sex.
I shrug, instinctively licking my lips as I look him over. “Short-lived fun.”
***
Jerkin’ my own gherkin is not something I do often, but when I do, it’s always in the shower. Clean up is so much easier that way, but I don’t feel like taking a shower for the sole purpose of busting a nut right now.
“Bingo.” I finally find an old bottle of Jergens and squirt a liberal amount into my palm, then pull my boxers down under my balls and slide my lathered hand along my shaft.
Shit, it’s cold.
It warms up after a couple pumps, and pretty soon the silky, gliding pressure has my heart racing and my free hand clutching the counter to steady myself.
My mind wanders to Savannah. She’s so unlike any other girl I’ve ever met. She’s got the face of an angel, but Jesus Christ, the mouth on that chick. I had no idea she was such a firecracker. She kept me on my toes the whole conversation and I loved every second of it.
I imagine what it’d be like to kiss those perfect, pouty lips and tangle my fingers in that long, wavy hair while I slide deep inside her. Or what she’d look like with her vibrator between her legs, her mouth parted in ecstasy as she works to get herself off. It’s got my hand pumping faster and my breath leaving me in hurried puffs as I feel the familiar tension settle into my muscles. My balls tighten. I’m so close—
“Oh my god!” Savannah’s surprised, horrified gasp rips me out of my high and turns my blood to ice as I freeze mid-pump and meet her wide eyes.
Fuck me, this cannot be happening.
I yank my boxers back up as she turns and smacks her face on the open door. She cups her nose in her hands as I wince and rush over to her.
“Are you okay?”
She squeals and thrashes out of my grip as blood drips from her nose. “Don’t touch me after that! Are you crazy?”
Dear God, kill me now.
***
“You’re not at all like I thought you’d be.”
Her brow arches. “Oh, yeah? How’d you think I’d be?”
“Nice. Sweet. Quiet.”
“Ouch,” she says, though she’s amused.
“No, it’s a good thing.”
She does this cute scoff/laugh and takes the ice pack off her face. “You’ve basically just told me I’m mean and loud. How is that possibly a good thing?”
I shrug. “It’s refreshing. Most girls I meet are very . . . agreeable, and from what I’ve seen, you’re not like that.” I laugh and say, “If I told you the sky’s blue, you’d probably argue that it’s not.”
“Well, you’re right. It’s the middle of the night. The sky’s black right now.”
“See? Very disagreeable. I like that.” I shouldn’t, though. A girl like Savannah would take work. She’d take time and effort, and when it comes to chicks, that’s not how I roll.
It might make me sound like a jackass, but my way is the path of least resistance. I don’t have the patience or inclination to chase after a girl, not when there are so many others willing to take her place.
But for some reason, Savannah’s resistance is fun. Entertaining, even.
***
Crossing my arms, I lean my hip against the countertop, watching him clutch the sheet to his lap. “FYI, I already got a peek at what you’re trying to hide there, and while it is impressive, it’s nothing that I haven’t seen before.”
A slow, easy grin spreads across his face as he nods to my clothes. “I’m telling myself the same thing about you, Kitten, but my dick just doesn’t seem to wanna listen.”
***
“Sorry, but I’m not a dick. I can’t just sit by and watch you come to work every day, knowing you sleep in that fucking tin box you call a car. I’m sorry, but I just can’t do it.” He shakes his head, agitated, as his knee bobs up and down. “I’m trying to do the right thing here, all right? Just tell me what that is, and I’ll fucking do it.”
My breath leaves me and a sliver of some unknown emotion tries to weasel itself into the vacated space in my chest. “Why?”
His fist slams against the table. “Why not?” He hangs his head as his fingers run through his hair. When he looks back up at me, his expression’s weary. “Don’t fight me on this. Just take it, please. For my ego and my sanity, just take it.”
The wall around my heart has been a part of me since I was old enough to know disappointment. No one’s ever been inside it, but I feel Declan’s words chipping away at the cold, harsh exterior, leaving me panicked.
I’m afraid Declan Whitmore could make the whole thing come tumbling down if I’m not careful.
***
“If you’re not gonna take my money, then at least let me do something else for you.”
He cocks a brow, his eyes flicking down my body.
I fist my napkin and throw it at him. “No, you perv! I meant like cooking and cleaning.”
Clearing his throat, he bends down and picks my napkin off the floor. “Good, ’cause I wouldn’t have taken you up on that offer either.”
My eyebrows shoot up in an incredulous expression. “Oh, really? Because your hard-on fifteen minutes ago says otherwise.”
Declan tosses my napkin onto his empty plate and stands. “Trust me, when we go down that path—and something tells me we will go down that path—it’s not gonna be out of some obligation you feel towards me.” He puts one hand on the table and the other on the back of my chair, leaning down to murmur in my ear, “It’ll be because you can’t go another second without having me inside you. And when that second comes, I promise you, Kitten, I will make you beg for it.”
***
“You know what they say about curiosity and the cat, right, Kitten?” Declan winks at me, grinning smugly.
My lips purse as I shake my head and buckle my seatbelt. He wants to tease me? Fine. But for his sake, I hope he can take it as well as he dishes it out. “Sorry to burst your bubble, but it wasn’t curiosity that had me barging in on you.”
Arm outstretched, he rests his wrist on top of the steering wheel. I can’t help but stare at all that inked muscle. “Oh, yeah?” he says, amused. “What was it, then?”
“Necessity.” My eyes flick up to his. “I’d just gone a round with my vibrator and I had a huge mess to clean up. I was soaked when I accidentally walked in on you doing what I’d been doing only minutes before.”
Declan’s smile fades, his face going slack before the back of his head hits the headrest and his eyes close. “I don’t even care if you’re kidding. I’m just gonna pretend like you’re serious, because holy fucking shit is that hot.”
“I am serious. Had to bite one of your pillows to keep from screaming out. And, um, I should probably wash your sheets when we get back. They got kind of . . . wet.”
His jaw clenches as his eyes squeeze shut even tighter. Gripping the steering wheel, his knuckles bleach with the force.
This is too easy.
I’m grinning like a madwoman as he reaches down and tugs on his jeans, trying to make room for the impossible-to-miss bulge jutting out from his crotch.
“You have no idea what you’ve just done.” His voice is low and hoarse as he looks over at me, giving me a rueful smile. “I’m gonna be a walking hard-on for the rest of my life because of that.”
***
Declan clears his throat and looks away, like his mind’s splashing around in the gutter, right next to mine. His voice is lower as he grips the steering wheel. “What am I gonna do with you, Kitten?”
It’s a rhetorical question, so I don’t answer him. But the dirty, sex-starved side of me wants to tell him, “Whatever you want.”
***
“There’s no sugar-coating my life, Declan. It’s fucked up and ugly.”
And here I thought my old man was bad. He’s a drunken stumble in the park compared to what she’s been through. “Would you be upset if I asked you for a hug?”
Her eyes dart to mine, and I almost flinch at the hate and disgust shining in the steel gray irises staring back at me. “Yes.”
I must be looking at her that way she hates. You know, sympathetically. Like the way a normal person would be after hearing something like that. “What if I said it’s for me, not you?”
Her brows lift in a “you gotta be shitting me” kind of way, and I can’t help but smile. “It’s true. After a horror story like that, I need to be comforted. I need you to hold me, Kitten.”
She rolls her eyes, but I see the smile tugging on her lips. “You don’t really strike me as the cuddly type.”
I point to the full sleeve of shapes, words, and colors inked onto my left arm. “Don’t let the tats fool you. My mom was very affectionate, and she taught me well. You won’t find a better hugger than me, I guarantee it.” As she laughs, I smile, thinking I really like the sound. “Just don’t tell anyone, okay? I’ve got a reputation to protect.”
She bites her lip and grins, and part of me just fucking dies at the sight. She’s so damn pretty. “Your secret’s safe with me,” she says.
***
This girl’s an enigma, I swear. She never reacts how I expect her to, and for every puzzle piece I solve, I discover ten more that have taken its place. At this rate I’m never going to figure her out and I think I’m okay with that. In fact, I kinda like it that way.
***
Declan’s eyes narrow as he studies me, like he’s truly seeing me for the first time. No one’s ever seen this side of me before. It’s scary and unnerving, and it makes me want clam up and not share anything else with him.
Amazement laces his tone as he asks, “How are you not just . . . broken?”
A sad smile parts my lips as I shrug. “Who says I’m not?”
His eyes search mine, stripping me raw until I feel more exposed than I’ve ever been before. “You’re not,” he says simply. “You’re too feisty. If you were broken, you wouldn’t have any fight left in you.”
***
Declan’s made no secret that he’s concerned for my well-being, and yet every time he shows it, I’m stupefied. I never would’ve guessed that under all that muscle and ink is such a big heart.
I’m terrified he could actually show me how to use mine.
***
He’s so beautiful I can’t stand it. I can’t even look him in the eye anymore. He’s like the male equivalent of Medusa, only instead of turning to stone, I’m in danger of bursting into flames.
“I’m getting your stuff. You’re staying with me.” He says it without pausing, without even looking at me.
I make a surprised choking/laughing sound in the back of my throat and say, “No, I am most certainly not staying with you.” I’m fully grown and have been taking care of myself since I can remember. I don’t need Declan or his handouts.
Well, except for the job. I need the job.
He sets a laundry basket on the pavement and glances at me. “It’s either that or you make room for me in your car. Your choice.”
My mouth opens, but nothing comes out at first. I think I’m struck stupid. “Why are you doing this?”
He glares at me. “Why am I refusing to leave an attractive girl alone in her car overnight? Gee, I don’t know. I must be some kind of asshole.”
Anger flares in me, and I’m thankful for the familiar emotion. Declan’s got me all mixed up, and I don’t like it. “Point made, asshole, but I’m not some stray cat you can just take in.”
A smile flirts with his lips as he nods to my pile of stuff. “Get your things, Kitten.”
***
“You’re really gonna make me stay with you?” I ask, disbelieving. “Even though I don’t want to.”
“Yep.”
I follow him across the street as he absconds with my things. “Some would consider that kidnapping, you know.”
***
“My keys are in my pocket. Mind digging ’em out for me?” He shifts the laundry baskets to expose the one closest to me.
“You want me to stick my hand in your pants and dig around near your crotch? Seriously?”
He barks out a laugh and tilts his hip toward me. “C’mon, it’s not gonna bite. I promise.”
My brow arches as I switch his bag to the other hand. “All right, but don’t come crying to me when your pissed-off hostage punches you in the balls.”
Tentatively, I slip my hand inside his pocket, hating the way my heart beats faster just from touching him. I try to tell myself it’s only because I’ve gone two months without sex and being this close to a guy is stirring up old, familiar feelings of lust, but I know that’s not true. It’s Declan who’s making me feel all light-headed and electric.
A soft laugh threads through the air between us, making the tiny awning seem even smaller. How can a laugh sound sexy? It shouldn’t even be possible. “Kitten,” he says, his deep voice snaking around that damn word like a caress, making it easier to bear. Shit, I think he could read the phone book to me and I’d be riveted. “I saw the way you were looking at me earlier,” he continues. “I seriously doubt you’d be anything but nice to my balls.”
***
Declan’s eyes land on me as I pull out my chair. “I didn’t know if you liked mayo, but—” he shrugs “—I figured you could use the calories.”
I roll my eyes, trying not to let on how much that stings. “Sorry my body’s not to your liking.” I’m not blind—I know I’ve lost a good fifteen pounds in the last two months, what with not being able to afford luxuries like food and all. But coming from Declan? Gorgeous, he’s-so-perfect-I-don’t-know-how-he’s-not-photoshopped Declan?
Well, his insinuation that I’m somehow not good enough hurts. The last thing you want someone you find attractive to point out is that you’re, well, not.
Declan takes another bite of his sandwich, his gaze level with mine as he chews, then swallows. “I never said I didn’t like it, I said there needs to be more of it.”
***
“Well . . . look at you,” I say, gesturing to the sleeves of ink sticking out from the sleeves of his plain white tee. “You don’t really look like the relationship type.”
“What type do I look like?”
The reckless type who specializes in amazing sex.
I shrug, instinctively licking my lips as I look him over. “Short-lived fun.”
***
Jerkin’ my own gherkin is not something I do often, but when I do, it’s always in the shower. Clean up is so much easier that way, but I don’t feel like taking a shower for the sole purpose of busting a nut right now.
“Bingo.” I finally find an old bottle of Jergens and squirt a liberal amount into my palm, then pull my boxers down under my balls and slide my lathered hand along my shaft.
Shit, it’s cold.
It warms up after a couple pumps, and pretty soon the silky, gliding pressure has my heart racing and my free hand clutching the counter to steady myself.
My mind wanders to Savannah. She’s so unlike any other girl I’ve ever met. She’s got the face of an angel, but Jesus Christ, the mouth on that chick. I had no idea she was such a firecracker. She kept me on my toes the whole conversation and I loved every second of it.
I imagine what it’d be like to kiss those perfect, pouty lips and tangle my fingers in that long, wavy hair while I slide deep inside her. Or what she’d look like with her vibrator between her legs, her mouth parted in ecstasy as she works to get herself off. It’s got my hand pumping faster and my breath leaving me in hurried puffs as I feel the familiar tension settle into my muscles. My balls tighten. I’m so close—
“Oh my god!” Savannah’s surprised, horrified gasp rips me out of my high and turns my blood to ice as I freeze mid-pump and meet her wide eyes.
Fuck me, this cannot be happening.
I yank my boxers back up as she turns and smacks her face on the open door. She cups her nose in her hands as I wince and rush over to her.
“Are you okay?”
She squeals and thrashes out of my grip as blood drips from her nose. “Don’t touch me after that! Are you crazy?”
Dear God, kill me now.
***
“You’re not at all like I thought you’d be.”
Her brow arches. “Oh, yeah? How’d you think I’d be?”
“Nice. Sweet. Quiet.”
“Ouch,” she says, though she’s amused.
“No, it’s a good thing.”
She does this cute scoff/laugh and takes the ice pack off her face. “You’ve basically just told me I’m mean and loud. How is that possibly a good thing?”
I shrug. “It’s refreshing. Most girls I meet are very . . . agreeable, and from what I’ve seen, you’re not like that.” I laugh and say, “If I told you the sky’s blue, you’d probably argue that it’s not.”
“Well, you’re right. It’s the middle of the night. The sky’s black right now.”
“See? Very disagreeable. I like that.” I shouldn’t, though. A girl like Savannah would take work. She’d take time and effort, and when it comes to chicks, that’s not how I roll.
It might make me sound like a jackass, but my way is the path of least resistance. I don’t have the patience or inclination to chase after a girl, not when there are so many others willing to take her place.
But for some reason, Savannah’s resistance is fun. Entertaining, even.
***
Crossing my arms, I lean my hip against the countertop, watching him clutch the sheet to his lap. “FYI, I already got a peek at what you’re trying to hide there, and while it is impressive, it’s nothing that I haven’t seen before.”
A slow, easy grin spreads across his face as he nods to my clothes. “I’m telling myself the same thing about you, Kitten, but my dick just doesn’t seem to wanna listen.”
***
“Sorry, but I’m not a dick. I can’t just sit by and watch you come to work every day, knowing you sleep in that fucking tin box you call a car. I’m sorry, but I just can’t do it.” He shakes his head, agitated, as his knee bobs up and down. “I’m trying to do the right thing here, all right? Just tell me what that is, and I’ll fucking do it.”
My breath leaves me and a sliver of some unknown emotion tries to weasel itself into the vacated space in my chest. “Why?”
His fist slams against the table. “Why not?” He hangs his head as his fingers run through his hair. When he looks back up at me, his expression’s weary. “Don’t fight me on this. Just take it, please. For my ego and my sanity, just take it.”
The wall around my heart has been a part of me since I was old enough to know disappointment. No one’s ever been inside it, but I feel Declan’s words chipping away at the cold, harsh exterior, leaving me panicked.
I’m afraid Declan Whitmore could make the whole thing come tumbling down if I’m not careful.
***
“If you’re not gonna take my money, then at least let me do something else for you.”
He cocks a brow, his eyes flicking down my body.
I fist my napkin and throw it at him. “No, you perv! I meant like cooking and cleaning.”
Clearing his throat, he bends down and picks my napkin off the floor. “Good, ’cause I wouldn’t have taken you up on that offer either.”
My eyebrows shoot up in an incredulous expression. “Oh, really? Because your hard-on fifteen minutes ago says otherwise.”
Declan tosses my napkin onto his empty plate and stands. “Trust me, when we go down that path—and something tells me we will go down that path—it’s not gonna be out of some obligation you feel towards me.” He puts one hand on the table and the other on the back of my chair, leaning down to murmur in my ear, “It’ll be because you can’t go another second without having me inside you. And when that second comes, I promise you, Kitten, I will make you beg for it.”
***
“You know what they say about curiosity and the cat, right, Kitten?” Declan winks at me, grinning smugly.
My lips purse as I shake my head and buckle my seatbelt. He wants to tease me? Fine. But for his sake, I hope he can take it as well as he dishes it out. “Sorry to burst your bubble, but it wasn’t curiosity that had me barging in on you.”
Arm outstretched, he rests his wrist on top of the steering wheel. I can’t help but stare at all that inked muscle. “Oh, yeah?” he says, amused. “What was it, then?”
“Necessity.” My eyes flick up to his. “I’d just gone a round with my vibrator and I had a huge mess to clean up. I was soaked when I accidentally walked in on you doing what I’d been doing only minutes before.”
Declan’s smile fades, his face going slack before the back of his head hits the headrest and his eyes close. “I don’t even care if you’re kidding. I’m just gonna pretend like you’re serious, because holy fucking shit is that hot.”
“I am serious. Had to bite one of your pillows to keep from screaming out. And, um, I should probably wash your sheets when we get back. They got kind of . . . wet.”
His jaw clenches as his eyes squeeze shut even tighter. Gripping the steering wheel, his knuckles bleach with the force.
This is too easy.
I’m grinning like a madwoman as he reaches down and tugs on his jeans, trying to make room for the impossible-to-miss bulge jutting out from his crotch.
“You have no idea what you’ve just done.” His voice is low and hoarse as he looks over at me, giving me a rueful smile. “I’m gonna be a walking hard-on for the rest of my life because of that.”
***
Declan clears his throat and looks away, like his mind’s splashing around in the gutter, right next to mine. His voice is lower as he grips the steering wheel. “What am I gonna do with you, Kitten?”
It’s a rhetorical question, so I don’t answer him. But the dirty, sex-starved side of me wants to tell him, “Whatever you want.”
***
“There’s no sugar-coating my life, Declan. It’s fucked up and ugly.”
And here I thought my old man was bad. He’s a drunken stumble in the park compared to what she’s been through. “Would you be upset if I asked you for a hug?”
Her eyes dart to mine, and I almost flinch at the hate and disgust shining in the steel gray irises staring back at me. “Yes.”
I must be looking at her that way she hates. You know, sympathetically. Like the way a normal person would be after hearing something like that. “What if I said it’s for me, not you?”
Her brows lift in a “you gotta be shitting me” kind of way, and I can’t help but smile. “It’s true. After a horror story like that, I need to be comforted. I need you to hold me, Kitten.”
She rolls her eyes, but I see the smile tugging on her lips. “You don’t really strike me as the cuddly type.”
I point to the full sleeve of shapes, words, and colors inked onto my left arm. “Don’t let the tats fool you. My mom was very affectionate, and she taught me well. You won’t find a better hugger than me, I guarantee it.” As she laughs, I smile, thinking I really like the sound. “Just don’t tell anyone, okay? I’ve got a reputation to protect.”
She bites her lip and grins, and part of me just fucking dies at the sight. She’s so damn pretty. “Your secret’s safe with me,” she says.
***
This girl’s an enigma, I swear. She never reacts how I expect her to, and for every puzzle piece I solve, I discover ten more that have taken its place. At this rate I’m never going to figure her out and I think I’m okay with that. In fact, I kinda like it that way.
***
Declan’s eyes narrow as he studies me, like he’s truly seeing me for the first time. No one’s ever seen this side of me before. It’s scary and unnerving, and it makes me want clam up and not share anything else with him.
Amazement laces his tone as he asks, “How are you not just . . . broken?”
A sad smile parts my lips as I shrug. “Who says I’m not?”
His eyes search mine, stripping me raw until I feel more exposed than I’ve ever been before. “You’re not,” he says simply. “You’re too feisty. If you were broken, you wouldn’t have any fight left in you.”
***
Declan’s made no secret that he’s concerned for my well-being, and yet every time he shows it, I’m stupefied. I never would’ve guessed that under all that muscle and ink is such a big heart.
I’m terrified he could actually show me how to use mine.
***
He’s so beautiful I can’t stand it. I can’t even look him in the eye anymore. He’s like the male equivalent of Medusa, only instead of turning to stone, I’m in danger of bursting into flames.
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