Monday, April 15, 2019

EDGER LIVES & Giveaway


This post is part of a virtual book tour organized by Goddess Fish Promotions. David Beem will be awarding a $25 Amazon or B/N GC to a randomly drawn winner via rafflecopter during the tour. Click on the tour banner to see the other stops on the tour.

Our dork of destiny rides again!

Edger is falling for Mary, his bodyguard, kick-ass spy, and cover wife. But she’s so hopelessly out of his league, it’s clear someone’s going to get hurt. Less clear? That someone may be the Prime Minister of Australia.

When Mary confesses her desire to kill the world leader whose assassination Edger’s supposed to prevent, Edger’s superpowers pick the worst time to stop working. Without a fully functional psychic superhero, their team of spies can no longer order him to probe Mary’s mind for ill intent. The stage is set for a confrontation that threatens to strip a defenseless Edger of his loyal protector just when he needs her most.

Return to the Collective Unconscious, this time with Listerine-chugging stoners, Hollyweirdos, commie-alien-kung fu robots, one space gorilla-unicorn, and an exceedingly lovesick Vladimir Putin.

Mind your fingers and toes on page 270. Those skydiving mind-control monkeys have been known to bite!

Read an Excerpt:

I find Mary in the walk-in closet after her workout. Three of her peering back at me with wide eyes. Four, if we count the sweaty, pheromone-blasting, flesh-and-blood Mary in the middle.

Her hands glide down her hips as she turns sideways. The mirror reflections copy her like evil clones. Her head tilts, and her unreadable gaze scans from three angles every inch of her toned physique. She eyes the contours of her breasts in an understated Calvin Klein sports bra; she examines her sculpted midriff and the concavity of her bellybutton. The Gigantic Rock glinting in the mirrors, her thumbs dip below the waistline of her yoga pants, cruise outward along the elastic, and tug once. She bites the corner of her glossy pink lip and scrutinizes every possible curve from the waist down—and with legs like hers, it’s a long way down—before flitting up to find mine, spanning those sexual leagues in an instant, and landing her gaze like a side-kick to the gut. I can barely breathe.

Air squeezes into my lungs like I’m sucking it through a straw-sized snorkel. I’m slouching. Better stand up straight. Unlock my knees. I’ve got to get it together. If she and I are going to live under the same roof, I can’t be falling over every time she has the audacity to exist. Otherwise, I’ll need some kind of house scooter to motor around on my butt all day. Beep-beep, coming through, time to brush my teeth—well, well, don’t you look hot again—okay, faint on you later.

About the Author: David Beem loves superhero movies, taekwondo, and flossing. He lives in Djibouti with his family and crippling self-doubt. To help actualize David’s inner confidence, visit his website and buy all the stuff: http://www.davidbeem.com

Amazon author page: https://www.amazon.com/David-Beem/e/B005M4NEYI/ref=sr_ntt_srch_lnk_1 .

a Rafflecopter giveaway

43 comments:

  1. Thanks for featuring my book today!

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  2. This sounds absolutely amazing!! I can't wait to read this!!

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  3. At which age did you have your first book published?

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  4. My first book was published in the Meghalayan age, the latest of the Holocene Epoch (although it is possible future geologists will one day recognize this as the Anthropocene).

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  5. This sounds like a fantastic read.

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  6. Will there be more books in the series?

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  7. I love the style of the cover. It sounds interesting.

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    1. You should check it out! It's a fun book! ;)

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  8. A great cover, right up my street!

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    1. Awesome! I hope you decide to give it a go!

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  9. I hope it's a series, it sounds interesting.

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    1. You're in luck! This is book 2. Book 1 is called "Edger," and you can find it on Amazon (Edger by David Beem). Hope you enjoy!

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  10. This cover is so awesome! The book sounds like such a great read.

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    1. Thank you! I love the guy doing my covers and can't wait to see what he does for the next one. ;)

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  11. Sounds like a great book, Love the cover

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  12. Sounds like a fun read! Love the cover.

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  13. sounds like a wonderful book, thanks

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  14. Do you feel pain helps you to write better?

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  15. How do you get inspiration from others?

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    1. Hi, Jamie. How do I draw inspiration from others? Hm. All kinds of ways. I start by reading, and if I'm about to write a comedy fiction book (like this one) I read comparable books and authors. Also, I listen to music. I try to listen to what my characters would be immersed in. Inspiration comes from so many places, but those are a few. Thanks for stopping by today!

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  16. What sort of stories do you like to write best?

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    1. Well, I'm two books into this series with a third on the way. My son (9) wants to be able to read my next one (he's not allowed to read these b/c of adult humor) so I'm going to do a YA comedy next. I prefer to serve a niche readership, people who enjoy my goofy humor. Thank you for your questions. ;)

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  17. Do you ever feel frightened in the pit of your stomach?

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    1. Why? Should I? (You know something I don't know?)

      ;)

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  18. looking forward to reading this

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  19. I hope you enjoy it. Thank you for stopping by!

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